I don’t want to sound corny, but YOU are seriously an awesome person with some amazingly unique attributes. Actually taking time to think about them will help you start seeing yourself as attractive.
I mean, think about it! How many times have you met a person (guy or girl) who was very attractive, but once you got to know them and know the REAL them, they didn’t look so attractive after a while?
And that’s why I really wanted to help you out with this. Yes, I will be giving some outer appearance tips, but mainly, I want you to focus on the inner you and loving what’s inside that. 🙂
Side Note: Let me know your thoughts on these tips and what you think makes people attractive in the comments down below. I’d love to hear!
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1. Who IS the Real You?
One of the BIGGEST ways to appear more attractive is being the real you around others. But that sounds cliche and frustrating doesn’t it? How do you be the real you?
Well here’s one way. 🙂
One important thing you can do is to listen to the negative things you say about yourself in your head & out loud. Usually, we don’t act like ourselves because we don’t feel comfortable being ourselves. We tell ourselves negative things like, “I’m awkward, “I’m weird,” “I’m stupid,” and because of this we assume OTHERS see us the same way. I’ve had the same problem and am currently working on getting rid of it myself!
Now once you find these negative thought patterns, I want you to stay conscious of them and REPLACE them with positive thoughts. Example, “No… I’m not stupid or weird or awkward, I’m a good person and people like me. They want to get to know me!”
You have NO idea how many times people really did like me and did want to get to know me (they saw the good in me, not ALL the mistakes I had made over my lifetime that I was STILL guilt-tripping myself over!), but I ended up projecting how I saw myself onto them. I assumed that’s how they saw me too.
So I stepped away from that. Now, I’m CHOOSING to realize that people do like me and see me differently. And if they have an attitude and are mean, that’s on them, not a reflection on me. 😊
2. How to Love How You Look in Clothing
Say this with me, “I do NOT look bad in clothes, but SOME clothes don’t look good on me.”
Clothing looking bad on you is NOT your fault!
I don’t care what size you are, clothing can look VERY good on you. It’s all about understanding your body shape and knowing HOW to style your body shape.
There are so many awesome blog posts or Youtube tutorials on how to figure out your body shape and dress for it; so empower yourself and feel confident! ♥️
3. Be Attentive
When talking to people, don’t ignore them. I mean think about it; how many times have you felt frustrated when you could tell someone was completely zoning you out OR just waiting for you to get finished so they could say what they wanted to say?
So much of being attractive comes from your very actions and putting others first. And I don’t mean constantly sacrificing for other; I just mean having a mindset to make others feel the way YOU would want to feel.
4. Happiness
Now I’m obviously not saying you have to be happy ALL👏 THE👏 TIME👏 . But practicing gratefulness for the good things in your life is a great way to be happier and spread happiness to others. Just as studies often indicate how having a good sense of humor helps one appear attractive, so will spreading happiness too.
I mean, how many times have you distanced yourself from a friend who became more negative over time? You tried to listen and offer solutions, but they wouldn’t take it. It’s honestly exhausting and frustrating and soon you don’t want to be around that person; they just don’t want to take the actions to make their life better and whenever you do talk, it’s ALL about them and their problems.
Now I doubt that you’re like this. 😉 But even so, I think it’s great to make sure you’re staying conscious of the above (gratefulness) so that you don’t stay stuck in a dark place and you’re a person people naturally gravitate towards.
5. Can You Be Attractive but Not at the Same Time?
Here’s the thing: you could be the most attractive person around but still appear unattractive. Think about VERY attractive actors who play the role of very average people in films. Their clothing looks like it was quickly picked off a sales rack, their hair (and makeup if a woman) is nondescript, and they carry themselves in an unconfident way.
THEN compare that to how they look on the red carpet. Their hair and makeup is completely changed and their outfit is tailored and looks like they had great thought put into it.
I kid you not! They look like a completely different person, and I had THE EXACT same experience.
I got into this rhythm for a few years of basically just wearing jeans and shirt and hardly ever doing my hair and makeup. And then in 2019, I FINALLY planned out a capsule wardrobe, went to the mall and bought what I needed and I never looked back.
In fact, one of my closest friends told me her first impression when meeting me last year. She told me that I looked confident and like I knew what I was doing.
And I promise you, the way you fix yourself up will not only change how you look, but how you act. You will definitely be giving off alpha vibes. 😉
6. This One Thing Will Also Make You Stand Out & Feel Different
Having a good posture can change how you look instantly. You suddenly stand out amongst everyone else who is slouching and look a lot more slender and graceful. In fact, a 1997 study found that good posture was a factor in how participants (university students) rated people’s attractiveness in photos.
And you know what? When you have good posture, you end up sending messages to your brain that makes you feel more empowered and confident (I’m not joking!). So try practicing it this week and see how you feel!
You deserve to feel better. ♥️
7. Giving?!
Ever wonder how certain people in your life got to be well-liked all around? Well, if you notice their habits and the things they do daily, they’re usually giving to others. Whether that’s saying a kind word to their coworker or getting a coffee for their spouse.
People are automatically repelled from those who are constantly taking. I would know! I used to be like that to a certain degree in late teens, early 20’s. I made friends but then they started to grow more distant towards me as they realized they were putting more into the relationship then getting back.
The Chinese have this word called, “Guanxi” which basically means to make sure you’re having a good flow of giving between you and another person. And you want to improve this “Guanxi” with others so that you can have the strongest relationships possible.
Being attractive isn’t just about wearing the right kind of makeup or clothing brands. A lot of it has to do with how you treat yourself and others.
So one of the best things you can do right now is to make yourself look and feel more attractive by giving yourself some self-love and loving others as well!
Hi, I guess I’m a little late to this party. I would still like to chime in, if that’s ok. I actually think I’m one of those people that gets walked away from! I noticed I have a lot of those traits you spoke of. I tell people about all about my problems, medical or otherwise, and don’t really pay attention to theirs (which is horrifying!!!). I don’t have but one friend and we don’t talk often, which is probably why we’re still friends! My siblings don’t like being around me, as a matter of fact, they are all on a camping trip with my dad right now without me!! I wasn’t even invited! They plan family trips all the time and never invite me; most of the time I find out on facebook!! So, my point in all of this?? It’s obviously me!! My two daughters and grandson doesn’t want anything to do with me either! I mean they text me, but I haven’t received a phone call in months!! What’s your suggestion?? What’s wrong with me??
Hey Lora, I’m so sorry to hear that you’re going through this. But I also think it’s very brave and good of you to realize that this may be something you need to fix instead of just blaming others. The most important thing you can do is to find a counselor that is going to walk you through what’s going on. So many times it can be related to what happened in our child and teen years and other traumatic events in our life. And when you uncover those, and find tools to work through them, you can start building healthy relationships. I hope this helps!
Thanks for that!! Could be doing with that this morning
Hi
I had been always inferior throughout my life because of my dark complexion and lack of knowledge in my field of work and all other things. I always used to compare myself with others and found others ways successful. But now when I started implementing some steps in developing myself, people sorted gravitating towards me and I feel better.
Keep posting nlmore of such positive habits.
This is so cool! Thanks for sharing!
Inspiring article! Thanks!
I’m fond of reading inspiring,practical & “feel good” articles.Being married for 31 yrs w/ 5 loving kids, still ,very much in love though not perfectly much in some ways,but embracing and accepting one’s uniqueness with respect,
and God is the center of our marriage,the attractiveness lives on….
Great advice that works for everyone and don’t forget to project kindness to everyone, this makes you look amazing to everyone!
Very beautiful, and these are actually keys of making anyone confident, couldn’t be more helpful , God bless you abundantly and shower His grace upon you ❤ ❤
I really needed this! Thank you so much for sharing. This is fantastic insight
I didn’t know I needed this until I read it especially the very first point. Thanks a bunch.
I love this ! As I have gotten older I have picked up a lot of these on my own but I wish I had learned this at a younger age I’m 60 .I really want my granddaughters to have this and try to instill this in there youth. Thank you
So refreshing to hear this. The world needs more of this. It’s peoples character that makes them who they are. Not money makeup or position (what they do) for a living. It’s the story. And uniqueness that makes each of us who we are. Making the time is important so that we the see inward.
Thank you ! Very insightful ,caring and action based. Loved it !
This is amazing sweetheart, most people don’t even have a clue about any of this…I feel like young people should hear this and generate their mentality in a whole new level, this is the big time baby.
I definitely needed to hear that, I’m grown but we still need to get boost to make us need to strive and build a strong foundation with ourselves that no one can break through or down..
I think this project that I wanted to start for woman movement, including all this positivity in building themselves and moving forward, never giving up and always keep your head up will be going into action soon.
Talking about that, I also have a brand called firmness..it was mainly for women, it gave me so much confidence in myself, like no matter what your going through, have firmness is the way to go. I later thought it’s not only women going through that, men go through that everyday too, so I made is unisex for both men and women.
Blessed night beautiful people, I totally feel blessed to be even writing this, this is GOD’s will.
Hey! I apologize that I’m just now seeing this!
Yes, I completely agree with everything you’re saying. People really do need this and it will make their lives so much more fulfilling. ❤️
I would love to see your woman’s movement! Please update me and let me know when it’s up!
I love your brand firmness! That sounds so encouraging and good! You’re definitely a go-getter and great at helping people!
God bless you!
Thanks !!! Love it
Iam 50 and starting to feel old and unattractive since I work with all young people.
So glad you like it! And I am sure you are beautiful! ❤️
Thanks I really needed this pep talk!
I will save this pin and read it every day until I see and feel changes!
Great… I agree with you 100%
Thank you so much , great pep talk .
Most time i get the feeling i am being sized up, but to feels more like sized down,in other peoples eyes.
It toke me till i was 30 to realize people are more scared of you. Because that means change. Their life is planed out and here you are new fresh. People my not want the old and want the new. Their life is lost.
We moved. Lot. When i was a kid. You think brothers And sisters mean being the new kid sucks. And i was the oldest. Mostly in small towns. I learned this is me. This stay maybe no friends maybe alot maybe the jealous girl or guy. Bullies. But i learned me
I am my own best friend. I have to live with myself. I’m 53 now have lots of friends but my best friend is my and my husband. I lost my first husband i was really sad but i am my own best friend i and here for me. The second husband loves me because i knos me. So he knows me and respects me. I love him and like knowing me.
This is all so good! I loved reading this. It really is good to be confident in who you are and find those people who love who you are and who you’re becoming. Thank you for this. 🙂
Great thoughts! It is so nice to see something uplifting. There is way too much negativity in the world and it is ruining humanity. I agree with you. Well said!
Thank you very much for taking your time to write this article. It was pleasure to read and understand. I wish you all the best, and keep spreading kind sentences throught-out to world ❤️Thank you SILAS & GRACE
You are most welcome and thank you! ❤️
Aèlways give a smile. Be kind and thoughtful. Be assertiveNot aggressive.
Exactly!
ONE of the first things I do in the morning after my coffee (I’m retired) is washing my face and brushing my teeth, face cream and blush and a little mascara. It makes me feel fabulous and ready for whatever the day will bring! If someone stops by or you have an errand to run or you want to take a walk you are ready to go. It makes me more spontaneous! Staying in pjs or sweats and not ready for the day doesn’t do much for motivation.
Gosh, I need to do this! haha Thank you for this Regina. 🙂
You nailed it for me; it’s what I needed to hear. I’m going to work on bettering myself for me and those around me.
Thanks so much.
I received comments from men and women telling my demeanor is appealing to them which I didn’t understand until I read this article. Thank you so much for sharing this-Norm
Of course! So glad to hear this article helped you! <3
Great points you stated..Something anyone can actually do.Everything you mentioned is achievable, thanks.
Thank you very much for this inspirational reminder to ourselves! I am embracing this message ! Gracias
SO glad to hear! ❤️
You hit the nail on the head.
I have 3 sisters all who are all about money, clothes, trying to keep up with the Jones & gossiping about everyone they know. I have felt for a long time that I was born into the wrong family. They also are tight & not giving of anything. I also had 3 brothers . My brothers & I were very common, nice looking ordinary humans. We visit & always try to keep the conversation positive. I have lost 2 of these brothers. In my book being kind & giving makes me happier than anything. Thanks!
I’m so sorry to hear about your loss, but I am glad you were given siblings you could be close with and related to. ❤️
Yes, these things will definitely make you happier than anything else!
I totally believe being yourself and standing on your own words and also being flexible and kind towards others is a wonderful way to make our life better! Yes, we learn this day after day. Maturity takes a little time to make us wiser and living better !
I have to agree, I clicked your link thinking it would probably be some make up or clothing ideas for different types and sizes of woman ,BUT I must say I was very impressed to read your list of qualities or suggestions that a decent human being should have! I enjoyed this article alot
I’m so glad to hear this! ❤️
I agree with the two comments above! We need more of this in this world. Thank you!
You’re welcome! 🙂
Thank you
You are most welcome. 🙂
I really appreciate this article! So helpful.
Thank you
You’re welcome! ❤️
I agree! I came looking for some beauty cream or timeless style…but even better, these tips are truly what makes anyone attractive! Great post!!
Thank you SO much! ❤️
This was really inspiring,and well written. I love how there weren’t any standards.I also clicked you
Thank you Jessica! ❤️
Would want to know about good habits to keep home , oneself attractive, good healthy eating habits , getting good sleep , how to keep interesting conversations on
Well then you’ve come to the right place! My blog has almost all of these topics! ❤️
Love; love loved this article❤️
So glad to hear Yolanda! ❤️
What an inspiring post, I wasn’t expecting the things that you had on the list…I was expecting a bunch of superficial qualities. But, I agree with the previous commenter…..the qualities you have listed are far superior. Nice job
A lot of what you say makes sense I’m nearly 50 and been feeling old and not liking my self very much been trying to find a way to get over the fact my husband been going on dating sites talking to younger prettier girls says he’s never cheated but to me that is
Oh wow, I’m so sorry to hear he’s doing this! I would definitely tell him you need counseling or there will be separation. You should never have to go through that. 🙁
That is so interesting. I clicked your Pinterest link because I thought there would be beauty / fashion tips, but actually I really prefer these. I also think (just slightly off topic), than great manners make a man sexy. Just sayin’. Keep up the good work.
Hey! This is my first time leaving some comment like this but I had too.. I’m 18 and this was really helpful. I really liked how you explained the points with extra tips! I loved this and you are AMAZING