I don’t want to sound corny but you are seriously an awesome person with some amazingly unique attributes.
And actually taking time to think about them will help you start seeing yourself as attractive.
I mean, think about it!
How many times have you met a person (guy or girl) who was very attractive, but once you got to know them, and know the real them, they didn’t look so attractive after a while?
And that’s why I really wanted to help you out with learning about the best attractive habits. Yes, I will be giving some outer appearance tips, but mainly, I want you to focus on the inner you and loving what’s inside. Because things like confidence, kindness, and personal growth is really at the core of these pretty girl habits.
Side Note: Let me know your thoughts on these tips and what you think makes people attractive in the comments. I’d love to hear!
1. How to Actually Figure Out the “Real You”
One of the biggest ways to appear more attractive is by being the real you around others. But that sounds cliche and frustrating, doesn’t it?
How do you be the real you?
Well here’s one way. 🙂
One important thing you can do is to listen to the negative things you say about yourself in your head and out loud.
Usually, we don’t act like ourselves because we don’t feel comfortable being ourselves. We tell ourselves negative things like, “I’m awkward, “I’m weird,” or “I’m stupid,” and because of this, we assume others see us the same way.
I’ve had the same problem and am currently working on getting rid of it myself!
Now once you find these negative thought patterns, I want you to stay conscious of them and replace them with positive thoughts.
Example: “No… I’m not stupid or weird or awkward, I’m a good person, and people like me. They want to get to know me!”
You have no idea how many times people really did like me and did want to get to know me. They saw the good in me, not all the mistakes I had made over my lifetime that I was still guilt-tripping myself over. But I ended up projecting how I saw myself onto them; I assumed that’s how they saw me too.
So I stepped away from that. Now, I’m choosing to realize that people do like me and see me differently. And if they have an attitude and are mean, that’s on them, not a reflection on me.
2. They Understand Who They Want to Be
While attractive women have worked to get rid of the negative self-beliefs they have, they don’t just focus on who they are right now.
They also figure out who they want to be.
So yes, it super important to get rid of the negative thoughts you’ve had about yourself (based on what unkind people have said about you).
That helps you to see your good attributes and what you’re actually capable of.
But it’s also important to focus on the kind of person you want to become.
You want to build on the amazing things that are already there so that you can become the best (and most attractive) version of yourself.
You wanna focus on taking on a value for things like positivity, authenticity, and emotional intelligence so you can actually grow into the best version of yourself.
3. How to Love How You Look in Clothing
Say this with me, “I do not look bad in clothes, but some clothes don’t look good on me.”
Clothing looking bad on you is not your fault!
I don’t care what size you are, clothing can look very good on you and can change your entire physical appearance.
It’s all about understanding your body shape and knowing how to style your body shape.
There are so many awesome blog posts or Youtube tutorials on how to figure out your body shape and dress for it; so empower yourself and feel confident!
4. Clothing Can Make an Attractive Person Unattractive
Here’s the thing: You could be the most attractive person around, but still appear unattractive.
Think about very attractive actors who play the role of very average people in films. Their clothing looks like it was quickly picked off a sales rack, their hair (and makeup if a woman) is nondescript, and they carry themselves in an unconfident way.
Then compare that to how they look on the red carpet. Their hair and makeup are completely changed, and their outfit is tailored and look like they had great thought put into it.
I kid you not, they look like a completely different person, and I had the exact same experience.
I got into this rhythm for a few years of basically just wearing jeans and a shirt and hardly ever doing my hair and makeup. And then in 2019, I finally planned out a capsule wardrobe, went to the mall, bought what I needed, and never looked back.
In fact, one of my closest friends told me her first impression when first meeting me. She told me that I looked confident and like I knew what I was doing.
And I promise you, the way you fix up and approach personal grooming will not only change how you look, but how you act. You’re gonna start feeling ridiculously confident.
So if you wanna learn how to dress attractive as a woman, then this is a huge takeaway!
5. Be Attentive
When talking to people, don’t ignore them.
Attractive habits often stem from very simple actions like listening.
I mean think about it! How many times have you felt frustrated when you could tell someone was completely zoning you out, or just waiting for you to get finished so they could say what they wanted to say?
So much of learning how to stay attractive comes from your very actions and putting others first. And I don’t mean constantly sacrificing for others.
I just mean having a mindset to make others feel the way you would want to feel.
And active listening and considerate communication is a great way to have meaningful conversations and make the other person feel actually taken care of.
6. Happiness When It’s Done the Right Way
Now I’m obviously not saying you have to be happy all the time.
But practicing gratitude for the good things in your life is a great way to be happier and spread happiness to others.
Just as studies often indicate how having a good sense of humor helps one appear attractive, so will spreading happiness too.
I mean, how many times have you distanced yourself from a friend who became more negative over time? You tried to listen and offer solutions, but they wouldn’t take it.
It’s honestly exhausting and frustrating and soon you don’t want to be around that person. They just don’t want to take the actions to make their life better and whenever you do talk, it’s all about them and their problems.
Now I doubt that you’re like this, but even so, I think it’s great to make sure you’re staying conscious of the above (gratitude) so that you don’t stay stuck in a dark place and you’re a person people naturally gravitate towards.
7. This One Thing Will Make You Stand Out & More Confident
If you’re learning how to be an attractive woman, then just know this:
Having a good posture can change how you look instantly.
You suddenly stand out amongst everyone else who is slouching, and look a lot more slender and graceful.
In fact, a 1997 study found that good posture was a factor in how participants (university students) rated people’s attractiveness in photos.
And you know what? When you have good posture, you end up sending messages to your brain that makes you feel more empowered and confident (I’m not joking!). So try practicing it this week and see how you feel!
You deserve to feel better.
8. Giving Can Make You More Attractive?
Ever wonder how certain people in your life got to be well-liked all around?
Well, if you notice their habits and the things they do daily, they’re usually giving to others. Whether that’s saying a kind word to their coworker or getting a coffee for their spouse, they’re being a thoughtfully kind person.
People are automatically repelled from those who are constantly taking. I would know! I used to be like that to a certain degree in my late teens and early twenties.
I made friends but then they started to grow more distant towards me as they realized they were putting more into the relationship than getting back.
The Chinese have this word called, “Guanxi” which basically means to make sure you’re having a good flow of giving between you and another person.
And you want to improve this “Guanxi” with others so that you can have the strongest relationships possible.
9. They Read & Learn to Better Themselves
There are so many books out there that will help give you a better life.
It’s so important to keep on learning how to heal from childhood trauma, become better at your finances, and so much more!
So make sure to not just hit the young adult section for books.
Go ahead and buy those books that’ll help you create a life you love.
10. Mindfulness
Mindfulness develops character and helps you appreciate the small things in life.
You also become more grateful for the things you have.
So even if you’re not eating a 5-star meal or have the most expensive clothing, you can still appreciate and pay attention to the good thing.
It also makes you a more attractive person to be around.
People naturally gravitate towards someone who is mindful and grateful.
11. They Do Social Media Right
Yeah, you probably weren’t expecting this one!
I love following encouraging people on Instagram that help with mental health, happiness, and growth.
Here are just a few of my favorites:
When you surround yourself with people who are growing, it encourages you to keep pushing forward.
12. They Know Their Worth
You are exceedingly important as a human being.
And self-love is one of the keys to having a happy life.
If you know your worth, you’ll never allow toxic people into your life.
You’ll know they only cause dysfunction and stress, and you’ll love yourself enough to keep them far away.
13. They Don’t Feel Pressured to Always Be Happy
Know that it’s ok to have a hard day or not always want to be around people.
It’s ok to have a day to yourself to do some mental/emotional/spiritual self-care.
It’s ok to tell yourself, “Hey, life is hard, but I can do hard things. I’m going to get through this. This moment will pass.”
Also, this makes you a more attractive person because…
- People will admire you for this.
- You’ll be the best version of yourself if you’re not always pushing yourself.
14. They Connect with People
Value your friendships and connect with people; pour into them.
Always be mindful to treat them the way you would want to be treated in every interaction.
Listen, build them up, give help, show real empathy, practice effective communication, and make them laugh.
By being a helping hand and a kind friend, this will help people to see the true you.
This is what makes you truly attractive.
15. Attractive Women Take Responsibility
Have you ever known someone where no matter what, they always had to be right?
That when they were called out, they would downplay what they did or make it sound like what they did was justifiable?
No one wants to be around people like that.
They’re the kind of people who even if they looked completely perfect on the outside, others would quickly find them unattractive.
People who are actually attractive see when they’re wrong, don’t hide it, and practice healthy conflict resolution.
They take responsibility and care about the person that was wronged.
16. Forgiveness
One of the biggest things about forgiving people isn’t just giving those who have wronged you freedom… but also giving YOU freedom.
Freedom from carrying those who have hurt you around in your head. Because they may be gone from your life physically, but mentally, they’re still there.
Also, make sure that you’re forgiving yourself. You may not realize it, but sometimes, you can sabotage your own growth and happiness because you feel that you don’t deserve a real shot at life.
17. Prioritize Yourself
Make time throughout your day for you whether it be through exercising, reading, self-care, or whatever hobby you have. As an attractive woman, you need to put yourself before others at times. This isn’t selfish. It’s healthy.
It shows others that you know how to look after yourself and sets the tone for relationships. That way, if someone who is a user wants to befriend you, this will help keep them away if they see you have clear & healthy boundaries.
It also means you can help others without burning yourself out and communicates to others that your help is valuable.
And in the end, a confident woman with healthy boundaries is someone others look up to and see as attractive.
18. They’re Courageous and Fearless
If you wanna know what makes a woman attractive, this is it.
Doing the right thing when no one is looking may be difficult, but being courageous enough to do the right thing in front of a crowd is what makes you attractive and respected.
And sometimes doing the right thing helps others to take a look at their own actions and change what they’re doing themselves.
19. They’re in Control of Their Emotions
This is definitely one of the best attractive habits for girls, and it’s a great way to grow in self-assuredness.
Being able to control your emotions is a great way to bring logic into situations where you’d normally be overwhelmed.
And it’s such a strong trait to be the calm one in a room of people who aren’t in control of what’s going on inside of them.
You set the standard for yourself and everyone else.
Also, people are attracted to those who can keep their emotions under control, and it gives them the strength to do so as well.
20. They Know How to Be There for People in the Way They Actually Need it
Attractive women tend to solve other people’s problems.
They are good-hearted people who care about their friends and family. They look for solutions and also realize that just listening to the person is all that’s needed.
Sometimes people don’t always need you to solve their problems and pain; they just want you to be there for them as they get it off their chest.
21. They Journal
Simple and easy, they journal about their problems and things they’ve been stewing over.
Writing things out can help them figure out solutions when they put those thoughts to paper (instead of just staying in their heads.)
And this can also be a great way to destress.
22. Consistency with Skincare Products
We’ve talked a lot about good habits and internal work that’ll make you more attractive, but here’s a good tip that’ll help you with your external beauty.
When you’re buying products, one of the best things you can do is to focus on consistency.
And whether that’s making sure you wash your makeup off before bed, or waiting for 3 or more months to see results in a skincare product, your skin will thank you.
Grace Moser is the author and founder of Chasing Foxes, where she writes articles to help women create a life they love in big and small ways. She's been a full-time traveler since 2016 and loves sharing her experiences and exploring the world with her husband, Silas. Her lifestyle and travel advice can also be seen on sites such as Business Insider, Glamour, Newsweek, Huffpost, & Apartment Therapy.
Great advice! Thanks❤️
This resource is unbelievable.
I am most of what you said and guess what?? Everyone thinks I am much younger than my age because you also feel young when you do all of the above. Thanks for getting them to our community. :=)
That is so cool to hear Pat! ❤️
Would love to hear a few ideas on the approach to a capsule wardrobe. How did start, etc.?
Hey Kathy! I actually wrote an article about it here if you’re curious! 🙂
https://www.chasingfoxes.com/what-is-a-capsule-wardrobe/
I stumbled across this page and so glad I did. Thank you for sharing these tips and your experiences. It’s really refreshing to read suggestions that go deeper than just “moisturize and eat your vegetables”. Those things are important too but real beauty is so many things both external and internal to create a whole image of health, happiness, and energy. Keep up the positivity!
Hi, I guess I’m a little late to this party. I would still like to chime in, if that’s ok. I actually think I’m one of those people that gets walked away from! I noticed I have a lot of those traits you spoke of. I tell people about all about my problems, medical or otherwise, and don’t really pay attention to theirs (which is horrifying!!!). I don’t have but one friend and we don’t talk often, which is probably why we’re still friends! My siblings don’t like being around me, as a matter of fact, they are all on a camping trip with my dad right now without me!! I wasn’t even invited! They plan family trips all the time and never invite me; most of the time I find out on facebook!! So, my point in all of this?? It’s obviously me!! My two daughters and grandson doesn’t want anything to do with me either! I mean they text me, but I haven’t received a phone call in months!! What’s your suggestion?? What’s wrong with me??
Hey Lora, I’m so sorry to hear that you’re going through this. But I also think it’s very brave and good of you to realize that this may be something you need to fix instead of just blaming others. The most important thing you can do is to find a counselor that is going to walk you through what’s going on. So many times it can be related to what happened in our child and teen years and other traumatic events in our life. And when you uncover those, and find tools to work through them, you can start building healthy relationships. I hope this helps!
There is nothing wrong, you are just perfect! Just be happy and talk to them about their life and likings or tell them your happy stories
You have identified your weaknesses. You’re on your way. God bless you in your journey.
You could be writing about me after the word horrifying. I am 71, have one friend and am very alone. Good luck.
Thanks for that!! Could be doing with that this morning
Hi
I had been always inferior throughout my life because of my dark complexion and lack of knowledge in my field of work and all other things. I always used to compare myself with others and found others ways successful. But now when I started implementing some steps in developing myself, people sorted gravitating towards me and I feel better.
Keep posting nlmore of such positive habits.
This is so cool! Thanks for sharing!
I love what you put out , is very important for women like us to support each other, I certainly understand everything on your post , And live pretty much of what was said .I work in a model ing school and those same value for all of us but there a bad side that not all women, accept us only because of other and their insecurity I been attacked lonely because of being this way , so I felt to stay away from a lot of women that are strong and supportive like yourself and hope that all women will start thinking the same way .love and light to all
Inspiring article! Thanks!
I’m fond of reading inspiring,practical & “feel good” articles.Being married for 31 yrs w/ 5 loving kids, still ,very much in love though not perfectly much in some ways,but embracing and accepting one’s uniqueness with respect,
and God is the center of our marriage,the attractiveness lives on….
Great advice that works for everyone and don’t forget to project kindness to everyone, this makes you look amazing to everyone!
Very beautiful, and these are actually keys of making anyone confident, couldn’t be more helpful , God bless you abundantly and shower His grace upon you ❤ ❤
I really needed this! Thank you so much for sharing. This is fantastic insight
I didn’t know I needed this until I read it especially the very first point. Thanks a bunch.
I love this ! As I have gotten older I have picked up a lot of these on my own but I wish I had learned this at a younger age I’m 60 .I really want my granddaughters to have this and try to instill this in there youth. Thank you
So refreshing to hear this. The world needs more of this. It’s peoples character that makes them who they are. Not money makeup or position (what they do) for a living. It’s the story. And uniqueness that makes each of us who we are. Making the time is important so that we the see inward.
Thank you ! Very insightful ,caring and action based. Loved it !
This is amazing sweetheart, most people don’t even have a clue about any of this…I feel like young people should hear this and generate their mentality in a whole new level, this is the big time baby.
I definitely needed to hear that, I’m grown but we still need to get boost to make us need to strive and build a strong foundation with ourselves that no one can break through or down..
I think this project that I wanted to start for woman movement, including all this positivity in building themselves and moving forward, never giving up and always keep your head up will be going into action soon.
Talking about that, I also have a brand called firmness..it was mainly for women, it gave me so much confidence in myself, like no matter what your going through, have firmness is the way to go. I later thought it’s not only women going through that, men go through that everyday too, so I made is unisex for both men and women.
Blessed night beautiful people, I totally feel blessed to be even writing this, this is GOD’s will.
Hey! I apologize that I’m just now seeing this!
Yes, I completely agree with everything you’re saying. People really do need this and it will make their lives so much more fulfilling. ❤️
I would love to see your woman’s movement! Please update me and let me know when it’s up!
I love your brand firmness! That sounds so encouraging and good! You’re definitely a go-getter and great at helping people!
God bless you!
Thanks !!! Love it
Iam 50 and starting to feel old and unattractive since I work with all young people.
So glad you like it! And I am sure you are beautiful! ❤️
Thanks I really needed this pep talk!
I will save this pin and read it every day until I see and feel changes!
Great… I agree with you 100%
Thank you so much , great pep talk .
Most time i get the feeling i am being sized up, but to feels more like sized down,in other peoples eyes.
It toke me till i was 30 to realize people are more scared of you. Because that means change. Their life is planed out and here you are new fresh. People my not want the old and want the new. Their life is lost.
We moved. Lot. When i was a kid. You think brothers And sisters mean being the new kid sucks. And i was the oldest. Mostly in small towns. I learned this is me. This stay maybe no friends maybe alot maybe the jealous girl or guy. Bullies. But i learned me
I am my own best friend. I have to live with myself. I’m 53 now have lots of friends but my best friend is my and my husband. I lost my first husband i was really sad but i am my own best friend i and here for me. The second husband loves me because i knos me. So he knows me and respects me. I love him and like knowing me.
This is all so good! I loved reading this. It really is good to be confident in who you are and find those people who love who you are and who you’re becoming. Thank you for this. 🙂
Great thoughts! It is so nice to see something uplifting. There is way too much negativity in the world and it is ruining humanity. I agree with you. Well said!
Thank you very much for taking your time to write this article. It was pleasure to read and understand. I wish you all the best, and keep spreading kind sentences throught-out to world ❤️Thank you SILAS & GRACE
You are most welcome and thank you! ❤️
Aèlways give a smile. Be kind and thoughtful. Be assertiveNot aggressive.
Exactly!
ONE of the first things I do in the morning after my coffee (I’m retired) is washing my face and brushing my teeth, face cream and blush and a little mascara. It makes me feel fabulous and ready for whatever the day will bring! If someone stops by or you have an errand to run or you want to take a walk you are ready to go. It makes me more spontaneous! Staying in pjs or sweats and not ready for the day doesn’t do much for motivation.
Gosh, I need to do this! haha Thank you for this Regina. 🙂
You nailed it for me; it’s what I needed to hear. I’m going to work on bettering myself for me and those around me.
Thanks so much.
I received comments from men and women telling my demeanor is appealing to them which I didn’t understand until I read this article. Thank you so much for sharing this-Norm
Of course! So glad to hear this article helped you! <3
Great points you stated..Something anyone can actually do.Everything you mentioned is achievable, thanks.
Thank you very much for this inspirational reminder to ourselves! I am embracing this message ! Gracias
SO glad to hear! ❤️
You hit the nail on the head.
I have 3 sisters all who are all about money, clothes, trying to keep up with the Jones & gossiping about everyone they know. I have felt for a long time that I was born into the wrong family. They also are tight & not giving of anything. I also had 3 brothers . My brothers & I were very common, nice looking ordinary humans. We visit & always try to keep the conversation positive. I have lost 2 of these brothers. In my book being kind & giving makes me happier than anything. Thanks!
I’m so sorry to hear about your loss, but I am glad you were given siblings you could be close with and related to. ❤️
Yes, these things will definitely make you happier than anything else!
I totally believe being yourself and standing on your own words and also being flexible and kind towards others is a wonderful way to make our life better! Yes, we learn this day after day. Maturity takes a little time to make us wiser and living better !
I have to agree, I clicked your link thinking it would probably be some make up or clothing ideas for different types and sizes of woman ,BUT I must say I was very impressed to read your list of qualities or suggestions that a decent human being should have! I enjoyed this article alot
I’m so glad to hear this! ❤️
I agree with the two comments above! We need more of this in this world. Thank you!
You’re welcome! 🙂
Thank you
You are most welcome. 🙂
I really appreciate this article! So helpful.
Thank you
You’re welcome! ❤️
I agree! I came looking for some beauty cream or timeless style…but even better, these tips are truly what makes anyone attractive! Great post!!
Thank you SO much! ❤️
This was really inspiring,and well written. I love how there weren’t any standards.I also clicked you
Thank you Jessica! ❤️
Would want to know about good habits to keep home , oneself attractive, good healthy eating habits , getting good sleep , how to keep interesting conversations on
Well then you’ve come to the right place! My blog has almost all of these topics! ❤️
Love; love loved this article❤️
So glad to hear Yolanda! ❤️
What an inspiring post, I wasn’t expecting the things that you had on the list…I was expecting a bunch of superficial qualities. But, I agree with the previous commenter…..the qualities you have listed are far superior. Nice job
A lot of what you say makes sense I’m nearly 50 and been feeling old and not liking my self very much been trying to find a way to get over the fact my husband been going on dating sites talking to younger prettier girls says he’s never cheated but to me that is
Oh wow, I’m so sorry to hear he’s doing this! I would definitely tell him you need counseling or there will be separation. You should never have to go through that. 🙁
That is so interesting. I clicked your Pinterest link because I thought there would be beauty / fashion tips, but actually I really prefer these. I also think (just slightly off topic), than great manners make a man sexy. Just sayin’. Keep up the good work.
Hey! This is my first time leaving some comment like this but I had too.. I’m 18 and this was really helpful. I really liked how you explained the points with extra tips! I loved this and you are AMAZING