Without a why, all your goals wouldn’t have a foundation to be built on.
I feel that at times, it’s so easy for me to focus on what I want to go after and change in myself. But then I forget to ask myself why?
Why is it that I want to do this? Why do I want to reach these goals? Why do I want to become a different person?
It’s so easy to get focused on the places you need to improve that your why ends up getting lost.
And then you end up taking ground in your change, and then having to retake ground because you’ve lost focus and your motivation had been lost.
And this week, I really felt like God wanted me to write on this.
The Importance of Your Why & Your Future
Besides keeping your on track and motivated, your why also helps you see into the future.
There was a study done that showed how the majority of us see our future selves as a completely different person. The part of the brain that lights up when we think about our future self is the same part we use to think about other people. Our brains don’t process our future selves as, well… us.
I feel that many of us in America (and other cultures as well) only think about the present and what they need to do now.
So instead of preparing for the future, or taking care of their future selves, they only focus on the now and make decisions in the now (not decisions for their future).
And I’ve found that having a why forces me to think of my future self. Well I want to change, and my why is keeping my looking at where I want to go. And my why is pretty important to me which helps me look forward.
The Japanese Culture is a Perfect Example of Forward Thinking.
Silas and I have been watching a lot of amazing and interesting Japanese craftsman videos (also, we’re in Japan now, so it’s cool to see it in action!), where they always have this future mindset in place. In fact… they take it one step further.
They’re concentrated on the next generation and how what they do will affect the next generation.
They pursue perfection without the hope of a finish and that has been a huge inspiration to me. It’s been so facisnating to see how their pursuit for perfection and hard work is affected by this mindset. They do their best, go beyond their best, and look to bless future generations.
But I’ll go more into that later on and in future Becoming Wonder Woman posts.
Finding Your Why
So you see the goals you’re going after right now right?
And it might be to work from home, find a new career, get rid of a certain set of bad habits that are holding you back, or have a family someday. No matter how big or small it is, there’s always a why behind it.
If your goal is to work from home, you might be doing it so you can spend more time with your family, make more income so you can retire sooner, or even travel full-time.
Or if there’s a bad habit that’s holding you back in life, you might be getting rid of it to help your marriage or other relationships, improve your health, or move forward in your career.
Just simply sitting down and carefully thinking through your why (or why’s) will seriously help you have a great concentration.
You won’t be lost trying to find new directions to complete your goals, you’ll see your why in the distance and be able to walk towards it.
What My Why Is
For me, I have three why’s. And they may just grow in number as I grow and keep changing.
I want to see who I was truly meant to be. Who God meant me to be:
This last week my husband and I were watching a really cool video on Suiseki. It’s the Japanese appreciation of rocks.
Here’s why it’s really cool.
They see beautiful ancient stones in the Japanese mountains and streams, take them home to be displayed in their gardens and home. Then, the first thing they do when taking it home is to clean it off thoroughly because all the dirt and mud is hiding it’s true form; the true beauty of the stone can only be shone when it is all cleaned off.
This really made me start to focus on how I want to know,
Who am I truly supposed to be?
The fear and other negative aspects that have clung onto me from the home I grew up in where never supposed to be a part of me. So what will I look like, who will I be when it’s all gone?
Who was the person God really made me to be?
As I’ve said before, my marriage is one of the main reasons why I’m making a change in myself.
The way I was raised growing up didn’t give me a good example as to how to be a spouse in an equal partnership.
I was raised to take from the other person, not give and this is not who I want to be anymore.
My husband is the most giving and loving person I’ve ever met, and he has really inspired me to become a better person and someday even beat him at love and giving.
Also, God has shown me that giving back to my husband will make my marriage strong and healthy. Something my parents growing up never had.
And the last thing I want is a marriage like theirs; I want something beautiful for the both of us and our future children.
Like I said above, the Japanese have a huge focus on their future generations.
They want to make sure that the crafts they make, or how they make their crafts is passed onto the next generation. They want to build something beautiful, something that will stick around for them for years and years to come.
My parents and my parent’s parents passed onto them something that was not good for future generations.
I DON’T want to carry this on for my children and my children’s children.
I can’t pass on the legacy they left for me to deal with.
I can’t see my kids dealing with the struggles I have to fight right now.
I want something better for my future generations and the kind of lives they live.
What my parents didn’t deal with and passed onto me and my siblings has only hurt us. And it has to stop.
It is strange when you start focusing on your future self, you’re forced to see them as you, not a different person. You start to see how your actions now will affect your future you and others in your life. And taking care of my husband is one of the biggest things I’m ever going to do in my life as well. What I do affects him in a huge way.
It’s also strange to focus on people who aren’t even in your life yet, like the generations that are yet to come.
But looking into your why and how your future will be affected by your actions now can give you a sense of freedom. That you’re making a better life for the years you haven’t reach yet.
So what’s your why? What are you working towards right now?